Writing a novel seems like such a daunting task, and I have this fear in the back of my mind that it will be one of those things that I start, and then never finish.  It isn’t really a fear that I can’t do it, but I always have this cloud hanging over my head.  Sometimes while I am driving (the best time to think, I might add), I ask myself, how do other people come up with all these fantastic ideas for a book?

I realized on Friday, the first week of my new writing goal, that not all authors have this magical, wonderful idea before they write about it, especially not the first book.  They just have a talent, an urging, to write.  Some of them, yes, may already have an idea.  People don’t just wake up one day and say, “AHA! I got it!”  Well, maybe they do, but I would bet you $10 that a lot of months – or maybe even years – of thinking and “other” writing went before that “AHA” moment.

With that in mind, and several days of freewriting under my belt, I decided to embark on the quest of making up some ideas.  I don’t know if I was just in the mood, or all those days of freewriting has loosened my literary fingers, but the words kept flowing.  I managed to write the beginning paragraph, the entire outline of the story, and the ending chapter all in one sitting.

Now, I have no idea if any of it is any good.  Next week when I sit down, I might can the entire project.  But next week when I sit down, I will also have five more days away from my writer’s block, with scraps of ideas written in my journal.  And with all of my writing, the entire thing will probably drastically change by the time I am done with it, that is, if I decide to use it.  All of the writers out there know what I am talking about when I say “use it.”  You just know when a story is good.

This happens to me a lot in my English classes.  I get an assignment.  I write five days in a row about this assignment, and all of the ideas are crappy.  Then, all of a sudden, the sixth day hits the jackpot and I write out the entire thing, words flying off of my fingertips faster than I can think.  I’m starting to believe in the power of awareness.

Two weeks ago, when I made the conscious effort to sit down and write this book, I became aware.  It’s like an assignment.  Do I think that the outline that I made is good?  I don’t know.  But it feels right.  It feels like I will use it.

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